I'm scared to get comfortable. I dont want to be stuck anywhere i dont want to be tied down. I'm in ridgefield and sometimes my comfort here scares me. What if i never get out? Do i even want to get out? Im not a city person but i dont want to be here forever. A huge part of me just wants to drop out of school and move somewhere just pick a spot on the globe and go for it. Make a new life and finally weigh things out. Ive never left. I dont see myself being able to offord leaving anytime soon. But what if i left and was happier? what if i left and i changed into something or someone better. You cant have life without the 'if' in it i know. I think this is just like a coming of age stressed out situation of unhappy contentment that maybe more people go through. I dont know, i want to do things i want to be a writer, a chef, a husband, a dad, an influential person with an impact on someone rather than no one. If you get comfortable in one place i feel like the oppertunity to leave comes up less and less. I just dont want to give up a risk worth taking on being comfortable and safe in ridgefield. What if?
